Expert Advice -Laura Ryan

Q: What are the differences in results that one will get from dating websites that offer instant gratification (i.e. swiping left and right) v.s. those that provide a more in depth look at the persons personality.

The instant gratification websites create matches that are solely based on physical appearance and we miss out on other important details that determine attraction. We lose the opportunity to see the wholeness of the other person, understand their point of view, and make an informed decision about who they really are.

Q: How can curvy men and women overcome challenges that online dating poses?

Studies have shown that 80% of men are contacting 20% of women on dating websites. Unfortunately, this means that most women get left out of dating searches. Staying positive and not taking things personally will go a long way to ensure dating success.

Q: What’s your Number 1 Tip for Curvy Singles in regards to online dating?

Make sure that your pictures feature your best attributes. Take photos from flattering angles to help you put your best foot forward. Consider getting a professional photographer to take your profile photos so that you can have the best lighting and create an online presence that really wows people. Make sure that you include one or two full body photos to let people know what you will look like when you meet them in person.

Q: What’s your Number 1 mistake people make when online dating?

I think that rushing to judgment is the biggest mistake people make with online dating. It’s human nature to be judgmental, but when we make snap decisions about other people, we might be missing out on a really good match for us.

Q: What’s your best advice on what to talk about or ask a prospective match when you are messaging them for the first time online?

Read through the person’s profile and mention two or three details that you noticed in their profile and share your point of view on what was mentioned. If the person you are messaging says that they like the beach and you’ve just gotten back from The Bahamas, share your experience and find some common ground.

Avoid generic messages like “What are you up to?” or “You’re beautiful”, it makes people feel that you are not very invested in getting to know them personally and that you are sending the same canned messages to multiple people.

Laura

-LAURA RYAN

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